A new correspondent from Carbuncle Township

Good news coming soon here at Mt.Flogmore. The Dead Ditch News was shut down just before April 15. It seems the publisher had a touch of Alzheimer's disease and forgotten to pay federal income taxes for the last 25 years. Why that might be good news involves us getting aa new correspondent who once graced the pages of the now defunct paper with straight reporting from the irrelevant area of the country. Flossy Onenoat (pronounced "one note") started writing to pass the time after her husband Wiley Onenoat died after choking on one of Flossy's boiled bologna slices.

But enough of yesterday's news..really today's history...from Carbuncle Township right in the heart of Bunion Gap hay country.

Flossy says, "Just wait, I will be getting out all the news about who motored all the way to Rapid City or negotiated all the tight curves between here and Sioux Falls. And you can bet I get the names of all the kids and grandchildren into the back seat too...so to speak."

Bet you just can't wait. Apparently she still thinks she will be paid by the word.

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Nice weather for the Sunday School Picnic at Mt. Blogmore

Beautiful weather for the Sunday School Picnic at Mt. Blogmore. Picnic lunch was delicious. Even the pickles were sweet. Well actually nearly cloyingly sweet, but that is a matter of taste. The Kool-Aid was almost addictive. Very few of the children had ever tasted it before. The adults thought it was an old familiar flavor however. Maybe it was orange or cherry with the wrong color. The sandwiches were delicious, but awfully small and the meat tasted a bit like Black Hills venison which gave the sandwiches an entirely appropriate pine flavor.

Obviously, no booze was served, and there were no stag movies or even voyeur bondage flicks, so there were no national GOP figures of prominence attending. No rapes were reported either. Sarah Palin was scheduled to fly in, but the fog prevented her from getting in. It was rumored however that the plane was actually being used by her to hunt moose or wolves or just to shoot up chunks of floating ice before those targets disappeared completely.

There were no actual quotations of Biblical text, but Darwin was attacked with vigor while even Catholic priests with undue fondness for children were defended.

Obviously a slow news day on the far west wing of the plains of Dakota.